The 1st Real Love of My Life

It started at a young age, that bond that a brother and sister have for one another.
That sense that no one could do me like he could.
He was there when no one else was.
He stepped in the role of a father to me although he was only three years older.
He taught me how a lady was supposed to be treated.
And that if a man really wanted you, he could wait.
He was the only one that opened up to me about his personal business, which enabled me to reveal to him my most inner and deepest secrets, I’d thought I’d never tell a soul.
He is the only one I can truly say I trust completely.
He has never let me down like so many have in my past.
I know he would never do anything to hurt me for he is always lifting me up and keeping me encouraged.
He was the 1st man that truly made me feel like I was so special and that he would do absolutely anything for me.
For many girls it’s their fathers that have that special place in their hearts but for me, it’s my brother.

It Wasn' t My Time

At the moment things have been a challenge for me.
I’m not eating, not sleeping well, and all I want to do is just lay in my bed under the covers and cry.
I never knew what really loving someone was like, but I’m quickly learning.
The butterflies I get in my stomach are so intense and I sometimes just can’t take it.
It’s like as if everything around me is falling apart.
My life as I once knew it is no longer there and I have now taken on someone else’s identity.
The identity of a girl I once used to make fun of because I didn’t understand her and her issues.
I thought I was too good to experience what she was experiencing; it just wasn’t my time yet. It wasn’t my time to experience all the joys and pains that come with love and being in love.
It wasn’t my time to feel vulnerable and to put my heart in someone’s hand.
It wasn’t my time for me to sacrifice everything about myself for someone else.
It wasn’t my time.